Think About It First! |
A few years ago I was attending a motivational seminar put on by a medical doctor who had built a nice series of medical clinics across the Northwest. He was actually a very good speaker. I liked the presentation he made. I still remember his subject matter very clearly. It was informational and funny. It was also very useful.
His subject covered the art of recognizing how "dead right" works in the world of leadership. He circled what I would call the subject of, "critical thinking." Yesterday I witnessed a business leader lose the battle of leadership with his "dead right" thinking. I also witnessed another leader lose the same battle in his personal life at home. I was able to see both of these troubling events on the same day, in two different venues. I considered this pattern a sign. I figured it was a sign that I needed to cover the depths of this interesting subject. How do we miss "dead right' patterns?
Let's leave the personal one alone in details. I care not to cover the details of that event in this kind of venue. I will say this much for that event, leaders can lose control in such a strong denial fashion. They can become so wrapped up with their emotional baggage that they do not see some very important leadership steps. This particular event was completely written by fear. Fear dominated the mind of that leader. I know he would not agree with that assessment, but it is true. His fears related to lost love crawled all over his methods for performing the silly mistake he performed yesterday. I also believe he walked away from that mistake believing he had won that awkward event of human exchange. He did not win it. He only believes he did. He will walk side by side with denial on this truth.
If you lead your business model and you are the leader at home as well, make sure you learn how to properly manage these two leadership roles. I can guarantee this leader who strayed off course yesterday has seriously damaged his personal home relationships with the act he performed yesterday. His lack of leadership did not go unnoticed. He inserted some serious damage in his effort to take control of something he needed to leave alone. We all feel like we need to control everything in our business and personal lives. We do not need to control everything. Sometimes important things need none of our control. I know this is a hard one to grasp, but leaders...get this one understood very well. Know when to hold up, know when to fold up and know when to run. That is a famous gamblers phrase. Make sure your leadership knows how to recognize this pattern of need. The leader I watched perform this stupid act yesterday is a leader who likes to control everything near his path. He stepped in some stuff that was none of his business. Then he smashed it around and made a big deal of it. It had nothing to do with his leadership life. He just wanted to serve his fears.
The doctor who presented the great seminar covered this subject very well. He described how someone can be 'right' about taking a stance on a serious subject yet being wrong if they express that stance to those who will not appreciate how they feel. He termed this process as being "dead right." We are right in how we assess our view, how we feel about the truth of our view and how accurate we may be for seeing some things the way we see them. However, because of some little circumstances, if we express those truths and our view about the truths as we know them we will likely lose our battle about those truths we share. We might actually become "dead right." The doc described in his seminar how many business leaders miss this tiny little step as they perform their daily functions. He described how often we make this silly mistake. We drive home a position of view that is totally accurate. We deliver it with a sense of seriousness and later we learn how damaging our position of stance was wrongly treated. We get burned by the other things that hurt our outcomes from the truths we shared because our stance of truth was not a stance that was a very wise one to perform. We become "dead right." It was a great seminar. It is a great subject. I witnessed this pattern twice just yesterday. Amazing.
The second failed leadership move is one that I can share details comfortably. It can come to the surface of discussion in this blog with more sense and respect. I have no problem sharing it.